Monday, October 10, 2005

Ten Things That Are Pissing Me Off Today

First in a Continuing Series






1.) W's Upper Lip

I hate it.

A pale wormlke bit of flesh, it clings to that blank neo-chimp face, poised above his rich boy pout, one moment twitching in a pseudo-Elvisian tremor of anger, the next moment rigid in James Deanian disdain, a lip for all seasons, ever treatening to give forth a full force vicious sneer that would reveal what W truly feels for the rest of humanity...
The fact that it's attached to the rest of him doesn't gain it any slack with me, either.
2.) Whining Hypocritical NeoCon Media Toadies ( WHNMTs®) like Michelle Malkin who are complaining about 'Bush cronyism'
Jesus woman, have you no pride at all? Or no memory of your own words? At least have the intellectual honesty to admit that you've viciously shelled those on the Left for making such a statement in the past. Sheesh.
3.) WHNMTs® like Ann Coulter who are complaining about Bush not asking the Senate for input on Harriet Miers
See above.
4.) WHNMTs® who continue on with their blubbering about how mean the Lefties are and how they (the WHNMTs®) should all take their balls and go home
Ahh, time to have a pity party. Seems I've been mean to some of those poor innocent NeoCons in comments on their nice little bloggies. My Bad! But as I've said many times in the past, I am not a gentleman. And nobody ever paid me to be nice.
5.) WHNMTs® who continue to insist that W is not the worst President since Andrew Johnson

6.) WHNMTs
® who lack a sufficient grasp of American History to even know who Andrew Johnson was

7.) Current TV versions of 50's Paranoia films that masquerade as contemporary science fiction
I don't get it. What's the attraction of shows like Surface, Invasion, and Threshold aside from their incredibly 'imaginative' single word series titles and their photocopy back stories and plots?

All three feature attractive women scientists/doctors and studly male army/law men. All three have sidekicks who are weird porn loving/ panty stealing/ computer game playing/ beer drinking brothers/dwarfs/geeky kids. All three tell us to be afraid, very afraid 'cause 'THEY' are lurking out there, in the water, waiting to poke out our eyes, suck our brains out via our noses and munch on our tender bits.


And, as Dan Ackroyd's Leonard Pinth Garnell would have it, all three are BAD remakes of 50's insect fear films. Instead of pods or giant manti, or lurking mama spiders we get a bunch of eels and squid and armored trout attacking us. Still the unknown enemy. Unseen. Ready to steal our precious bodily fluids.

I mean, give me a break.


Does anyone besides me find it oddly significant that in a time when the evil most feared by America skulks about in the driest part of the world, the monsters of TV hide in the water? Just sayin....
8.) Barbara Bush
Babs, born with a silver spoon for every orifice, managed to make Marie Antoinette look like Karl Marx with her remarks on the sheer unbridled luck of the New Orleans refugees who were evacuated to Texas.

You go, girl.

Straight to Hell.

Hope that works well for you.

9.) Global Warming Deniers

People who deny the reality of global warming, climate change and the other human compounded environmental catastrophes that we are now facing are no better intellectually or morally than those who deny the reality of the Holocaust. Both groups work hard to prevent remediation of the conditions that led to the disaster in the first place. Both would have us believe that these things just happen. Both refuse to admit that they were wrong and in the process perpetuate the danger.

Just as governments and individuals in the late 1930's refused to heed the growing evidence of the crimes committed by the Nazis, for the past two decades business and government have refused to see the hand of man in the rapidly changing deterioration of the global environment.

And just as the failure to take action in the 1940's resulted in the deaths of millions, it is likely that the blindness of the climate change deniers will result in the deaths of hundreds of millions.

Even now, the lust for profit wins out over the lives of people in climate policy. By waiting these twenty years, we have allowed a process that we can now neither stop nor predict to begin.

Which crime is greater?
10.) The New York Yankees
The NeoCon Revolution in pinstipes and cleated shoes.

Bloated. Lazy. Greedy. Arrogant. Profoundly unaware of the damage they do.


They epitomize everything that is wrong with America.


A clear refutation of the old adage that you can never look too good or have too much money.

5 comments:

PridePress said...

Bravo!

handdrummer said...

Thanks.

And it was downright swell to see JoePa and his boys take the Buckeyes to the house.

Sornie said...

Now I have a fear of silver spoons due to the fact that Barabra Bush has many orifices, all of which I would run far away from if they contained a spoon.

Anonymous said...

"A pale wormlke bit of flesh, it clings to that blank neo-chimp face, poised above his rich boy pout, one moment twitching in a pseudo-Elvisian tremor of anger, the next moment rigid in James Deanian disdain, a lip for all seasons, ever treatening to give forth a full force vicious sneer that would reveal what W truly feels for the rest of humanity..."

Lol, so funny!

Alicia Morgan said...

One and eight - you're killing me! I second denisdekat's emotion. Very well done.